The Mighty One, God the LORD, has spoken and called the earth from the rising of the sun to its going down. Out of Zion, the perfection of beauty, God will shine forth. Our God shall come, and shall not keep silent; a fire shall devour before Him, and it shall be very tepestuous all around Him.
He shall call to the heavens from above, and to the earth, that He may judge His people; "Gather My saints together to Me, those who have made a covenant with Me by sacrifice." Let the heavens declare His righteousness, for God Himself is judge.
Selah
"Hear, O My people, and I will speak, O Israel, and I will testify against you; I am God, your God! I will not rebuke you for your sacrifices or your burnt offerings, which are continually before Me. I will not take a bull from your house, nor goats out of your folds. For every beast of the forest is Mine, and the cattle on a thousand hills. I know all the birds of the mountains and the wild beasts of the field are Mine.
"If I were hungry, I would not tell you; for the world is Mine, and all its fullness. Will I eat the flesh of bulls, or drink the blood of goats? Offer to God thanksgiving and pay your vows to the Most High. Call upon Me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you shall glorify Me."
But to the wicked God says: "What right have you to declare My statues, or take My covenant in your mouth, seeing you hate instruction, and cast My words behind you? When you saw a thief, you consented with him, and have been a partaker with adulterers. You give your mouth to evil, and your tongue frames deceit. You sit and speak against your brother; You slander your own mother's son. These things you have done, and I kept silent; You thought that I was altogether like you; But I will rebuke you, and set them in order before your eyes."
"Now consider this, you who forget God, lest I tear you in pieces, and there be none to deliver; Whoever offers praise glorifies Me; and to him who orders his conduct aright I will show the salvation of God."
Psalm 50
God, this is who You are. God, you will shine forth. Mighty God, you will not keep silent. All-knowing counselor, You alone know the beginning through to the end. You don't desire sacrifices and actions I take to outwardly please You while my inward heart is in a whirlwind of all manner of despair. You say, "Call upon Me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you shall glorify Me." I call upon you right now, right here. Deliver. Shine forth. With Your fire, burn up the chaff of my life; I trust Your refining fire.
I offer you thanksgiving. I don't know how You are going to provide, I just know You are. Thank You. I don't know how you are going to guide, I just know you are. Thank You. I don't know what new steps of faith or obedience I'm going to have to take, I just know I will. Thank You and, Father, help me. I don't know how all these dead ended situations in my life are going to be used for good, but Your word says, "All things work together for the good to those who love God and are called according to His purpose." Thank You. Thank You for Your Word; Saturate me. Thank You for cleansing me with Your Word.
God, others need You too. Others need to hear You. Draw them to Your word. Work on behalf of Your children. Comfort their weary and frail hearts. Hold them. Shelter them. Be their refuge. All that you promise to be, You are; Remind them. Give Your children strength to speak of You, live for You, love because of You. Fulfill all our purposes! We are Your children, Father. Who else do we have to show us how to live but you? Who else can we glean strength? Where else can we find wisdom? Nothing else but You will do; You are everything. Stir our hearts, strengthen our legs, help us stand and fight and conquer. Turn our love toward You and help us to love others, oh please, help us to love.
Thank You God for never forsaking us. Thank You that when we seek first the Kingdom of Heaven, all the things that concern us are added to us. Thank you that You provide.
Thank You God. Thank You for all you are doing and all you have yet to do.
These praises I offer You. Bring salvation. I love You Father.
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Compelled by God's Love
I am taking a class entitled, "The Attributes of God". Our teacher is Brian Broderson and the book we are studying through is "Knowing God" by J.I. Packer. Today's topic of study was "The Love of God". What a vast topic.
"For this reason I bow my knees to the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, from whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named, that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might through His Spirit in the inner man, that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and rounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height- to know the Love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God."
-Eph. 3:14-19
My heart is rattled a bit. In the light of God's pure love, my filthy and self-seeking love is exposed. Do I even love? Of myself, I know that the answer is, "no". I don't love; I can't love of myself. Yet I find myself faking love or trying to use my own love. I know that is a deep confession, but it is true. I try to, out of my own goodness, show goodness to others and when I'm not feeling good, I'm not being good to others. I beat up those who are most precious around me, falsely claiming that I still love them.
View my life and you will see a sinner. View my journal pages and you will hear selfish requests. Why would God choose me? Why would He still want to use me? Why would I still be worthy of pure, jealous, sincere love?
"But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up together, and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, that in the ages to come He might show the exceeding riches of His grace in His kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast. For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them."
-Ephesians 2:4-13
When Jesus was praying to God right before He was going to be tried in court for His claims to be God, he prayed this:
"I do not pray for these alone [people that already believed that He was the Messiah and Son of God], but also for those who will believe in Me through their word; that they all may be one, as You, Father, are in Me, and I in You; that they also may be one in Us, that the world may believe that You sent Me. And the glory which You gave Me I have given them, that they may be one just as We are one; I in them, and You in Me; that they may be made perfect in one, and that the world may know that You have sent Me, and have loved them as You have loved Me. Father, I desire that they also whom You gave Me may be with Me where I am, that they may behold My glory which You have given Me; for You loved me before the foundation of the world."
-John 17:20-24
God has loved us from before the foundations of the World, just like He loved His one and only begotten Son, God in flesh. He's really loved us like He's loved Himself I suppose. Didn't Paul exhort husbands also to love his wife like he loves himself; like he nourishes and takes care of himself? And doesn't Paul also say that husbands are to lay down their lives for their wives like Christ laid down His life for us?
I do believe this entry contains a theme of a previous entry... Selfless love. I suppose it is an unescapeable theme.
How can God so equate with us? Why does He? Why did He choose to become so much lower than His glory to equate with sinful sinners, such as us? Why has wanting oneness with us?
Love.
J.I. Packer says this:
So the love of the God who is spirit is no fitful, fluctuating thing, as human love is, nor is it a mere impotent longing for things that may never be; it is, rather, a spontaneous determination of God's whole being in an attitude of benevolence and benefaction, an attitude freely chosen and firmly fixed. There are no inconsistencies or vicissitudes in the love of the almighty God who is spirit. His love is "as strong as death" (song 8:6). "Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away" (song 8:7). Nothing can separate from it those whom it has once embraced (Rom 8:35-39).
God loves because He has solidified that choice, and nothing can revert it. How foreign to us, who so often receive and give fluctuating love. My love can be so based on emotion, circumstance and surroundings. God's love is so opposite of that. I need Him to love through me. Oh, how I need God to supernaturally and miraculously love through me.
"For the love of Christ compels us, because we judge thus; that if One died for all, then all died; and he died for all, that those who lives should live no longer for themselves, but for Him who died for them and rose again."
2 Cor. 5:14 & 15
"For this reason I bow my knees to the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, from whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named, that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might through His Spirit in the inner man, that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and rounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height- to know the Love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God."
-Eph. 3:14-19
My heart is rattled a bit. In the light of God's pure love, my filthy and self-seeking love is exposed. Do I even love? Of myself, I know that the answer is, "no". I don't love; I can't love of myself. Yet I find myself faking love or trying to use my own love. I know that is a deep confession, but it is true. I try to, out of my own goodness, show goodness to others and when I'm not feeling good, I'm not being good to others. I beat up those who are most precious around me, falsely claiming that I still love them.
View my life and you will see a sinner. View my journal pages and you will hear selfish requests. Why would God choose me? Why would He still want to use me? Why would I still be worthy of pure, jealous, sincere love?
"But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up together, and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, that in the ages to come He might show the exceeding riches of His grace in His kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast. For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them."
-Ephesians 2:4-13
When Jesus was praying to God right before He was going to be tried in court for His claims to be God, he prayed this:
"I do not pray for these alone [people that already believed that He was the Messiah and Son of God], but also for those who will believe in Me through their word; that they all may be one, as You, Father, are in Me, and I in You; that they also may be one in Us, that the world may believe that You sent Me. And the glory which You gave Me I have given them, that they may be one just as We are one; I in them, and You in Me; that they may be made perfect in one, and that the world may know that You have sent Me, and have loved them as You have loved Me. Father, I desire that they also whom You gave Me may be with Me where I am, that they may behold My glory which You have given Me; for You loved me before the foundation of the world."
-John 17:20-24
God has loved us from before the foundations of the World, just like He loved His one and only begotten Son, God in flesh. He's really loved us like He's loved Himself I suppose. Didn't Paul exhort husbands also to love his wife like he loves himself; like he nourishes and takes care of himself? And doesn't Paul also say that husbands are to lay down their lives for their wives like Christ laid down His life for us?
I do believe this entry contains a theme of a previous entry... Selfless love. I suppose it is an unescapeable theme.
How can God so equate with us? Why does He? Why did He choose to become so much lower than His glory to equate with sinful sinners, such as us? Why has wanting oneness with us?
Love.
J.I. Packer says this:
So the love of the God who is spirit is no fitful, fluctuating thing, as human love is, nor is it a mere impotent longing for things that may never be; it is, rather, a spontaneous determination of God's whole being in an attitude of benevolence and benefaction, an attitude freely chosen and firmly fixed. There are no inconsistencies or vicissitudes in the love of the almighty God who is spirit. His love is "as strong as death" (song 8:6). "Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away" (song 8:7). Nothing can separate from it those whom it has once embraced (Rom 8:35-39).
God loves because He has solidified that choice, and nothing can revert it. How foreign to us, who so often receive and give fluctuating love. My love can be so based on emotion, circumstance and surroundings. God's love is so opposite of that. I need Him to love through me. Oh, how I need God to supernaturally and miraculously love through me.
"For the love of Christ compels us, because we judge thus; that if One died for all, then all died; and he died for all, that those who lives should live no longer for themselves, but for Him who died for them and rose again."
2 Cor. 5:14 & 15
Saturday, February 20, 2010
New Steps
Where do I begin? Where do I start? How do I begin to write and what do I share?
I'm still here in Huntington Beach, CA for everyone who thinks I've fallen off the face of the planet. I'm still attending the SOW and I am being stretched.
One very new thing that I am doing is leading a worship band in school. I've never lead a worship band or any type of band ever before. We have a great bassist, drummer, pianist, electric guitarist, and anther co-leader in vocals and on acoustic. This experience is stretching and super humbling. I know that I don't have the greatest voice. I know I am by far not the most skilled guitarist (I'm just a beginner!). I know that I'm way more comfortable singing harmonies and playing nothing. But God, but God, hasn't chosen that for me.
1 Cor. 1:26-31 says, For you see your calling, brethren, that not many wise according to the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble, are called. But God has chosen the foolish things of the world to put to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to put to shame the things which are mighty; and the things which are despised God has chosen, and the things which are not, to bring to nothing the things that are, that no flesh should glory in His presence. But of Him you are in Christ Jesus, who became for us wisdom from God- and righteousness and sanctification and redemption- that, as it is written, 'He who glories, let him glory in the LORD.'"
This is a section of scripture I'm holding onto right now, each day, each time I walk in the calling God has on my life. My calling is not always hard; I think that our callings are a lot more simple that we all think. Our callings are our lives, just living each day and following Jesus. Some days, it's so fun and simple and nerve-free to walk in my calling. Other days, like many days lately, my calling is nerve-wracking, sweat producing, and anxiety causing... well, that last statement isn't entirely true. My calling is good, but I try so many times to fulfill that calling in my own strength and that's when I get stressed.
It would be a lot easier to just retreat; it would be a lot easier to pack up my bags, to go back to familiarity, to settle into a routine and to surround myself with people whom I have known for years. It would be less stressful, less sweat causing.... it would be less.
Each step taken in this life is a step of faith. We are on this upward climb; on a great and beautiful hike up a large, cloud covered mountain. We can't see the peak, but we take steps upward because we have the end in mind. The destination that gives the motive for the whole hike is unseen yet fully hoped for. I find there are points in this hike that I reach the area of the cloud coverage, and I think "ah, yes, I've gotten as far up this mountain as I can see is here", but then, after wiping my brow, setting down my backpack, I gaze up and the clouds have lifted. There is more mountain to climb. "BUT I GOT AS FAR AS I COULD SEE" my anxious heart exclaims. Now, there is more mountain to climb, the grade is steep, and the next steps are going to take more energy.
That is completely how life is for me. I want to reach that spot, but that spot is unreachable here on earth; that spot, that area of rest, is heaven and it truly is the end goal.
So what do I do in my weakness? What do I do when each step gets harder to take? Has God still ordained and chosen this hike for me when I am weak, when I am frail, when I don't feel qualified to continue? Yes. God has chosen the weak things of this world to confound the wise. The wise, in this world at least, have stopped climbing a long time ago (or never even started climbing) because logically, it didn't make sense to climb the mountain. But God has chosen this beautiful hike, this upward calling, for me and being weak is full qualification.
Do you feel weak? Are people giving you their wisdom that is completely opposite of what God is calling you to? Do you feel feeble? If those answers are yes, know that God has called you and God has chosen you to endeavor on this faith filled hike in life. What are the areas that fearful in your life? What are the hindrances that are in your thoughts that are keeping you from continuing? I know it is so needful for me to write down those things, identify them, see them written on paper and look at them soberly.
We need to remind ourselves of God's truth. God's truth is "Who is he who condemns? It is Christ who died, and furthermore is also risen, who is even at the right hand of God, who also makes intercession for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril or sword?... Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us." Romans 8:34-37.
So my weakness, my frailty, my simplicity, my lack of musical perfection or perfect pitch or ability to hit the right chords on the guitar, doesn't disqualify me. God hasn't judged me, like an American Idol panel, and told me to go home. I have just almost asked that He would send me home. How silly is that? Oh how fear and worry inhibit faith.
Tomorrow I am leading worship for the k-5 Sunday schoolers at Calvary Chapel Beachside. This is the first time I'll be leading at beachside on a Sunday and I can't think of a better audience. I know children are very forgiving- they won't have critical ears when I mess up. In fact, I've heard that these kids are so great that they dance and clap their hands when they worship and I am so looking forward to that time of uninhibited worship. I know I'll learn from them tomorrow and receive a bulky blessing.
My mind ponders this: Who am I that God would use me? Who am I that He would choose me? I am nothing, and yet He wants me. I am nothing, and yet He uses me. These facts have been blowing my mind and have put all logic in the dumpster. God's love is so illogical! God's love is incalculable! My thoughts can't compartmentalize it.
Faith. This whole life in Christ is completely settled in this one word. Faith; not even my own but it is the free gift of God (Eph. 2:8-10). But why? I'm not deserving this gift, I'm not deserving of a life full of God's blessings, I'm not deserving of a great calling, I'm not deserving of my desires being fulfilled. But God, just because, has made up His mind to love me unconditionally. The same is for you. God has great things for you just because He loves you.
This post is long and probably much more beneficial to me than to you. Sometimes I just need to write out the swells of thoughts that are in my head and heart. I guess tonight was just a time of opening the flood-gates. I do hope you are encouraged, by this feeble, small, insignificant and weak woman to continue in your own personal life. So are you weak? Well, than just like me, we're qualified and chosen. Let's keep our faith in God and let Him do all He desires to do through us.
I'm still here in Huntington Beach, CA for everyone who thinks I've fallen off the face of the planet. I'm still attending the SOW and I am being stretched.
One very new thing that I am doing is leading a worship band in school. I've never lead a worship band or any type of band ever before. We have a great bassist, drummer, pianist, electric guitarist, and anther co-leader in vocals and on acoustic. This experience is stretching and super humbling. I know that I don't have the greatest voice. I know I am by far not the most skilled guitarist (I'm just a beginner!). I know that I'm way more comfortable singing harmonies and playing nothing. But God, but God, hasn't chosen that for me.
1 Cor. 1:26-31 says, For you see your calling, brethren, that not many wise according to the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble, are called. But God has chosen the foolish things of the world to put to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to put to shame the things which are mighty; and the things which are despised God has chosen, and the things which are not, to bring to nothing the things that are, that no flesh should glory in His presence. But of Him you are in Christ Jesus, who became for us wisdom from God- and righteousness and sanctification and redemption- that, as it is written, 'He who glories, let him glory in the LORD.'"
This is a section of scripture I'm holding onto right now, each day, each time I walk in the calling God has on my life. My calling is not always hard; I think that our callings are a lot more simple that we all think. Our callings are our lives, just living each day and following Jesus. Some days, it's so fun and simple and nerve-free to walk in my calling. Other days, like many days lately, my calling is nerve-wracking, sweat producing, and anxiety causing... well, that last statement isn't entirely true. My calling is good, but I try so many times to fulfill that calling in my own strength and that's when I get stressed.
It would be a lot easier to just retreat; it would be a lot easier to pack up my bags, to go back to familiarity, to settle into a routine and to surround myself with people whom I have known for years. It would be less stressful, less sweat causing.... it would be less.
Each step taken in this life is a step of faith. We are on this upward climb; on a great and beautiful hike up a large, cloud covered mountain. We can't see the peak, but we take steps upward because we have the end in mind. The destination that gives the motive for the whole hike is unseen yet fully hoped for. I find there are points in this hike that I reach the area of the cloud coverage, and I think "ah, yes, I've gotten as far up this mountain as I can see is here", but then, after wiping my brow, setting down my backpack, I gaze up and the clouds have lifted. There is more mountain to climb. "BUT I GOT AS FAR AS I COULD SEE" my anxious heart exclaims. Now, there is more mountain to climb, the grade is steep, and the next steps are going to take more energy.
That is completely how life is for me. I want to reach that spot, but that spot is unreachable here on earth; that spot, that area of rest, is heaven and it truly is the end goal.
So what do I do in my weakness? What do I do when each step gets harder to take? Has God still ordained and chosen this hike for me when I am weak, when I am frail, when I don't feel qualified to continue? Yes. God has chosen the weak things of this world to confound the wise. The wise, in this world at least, have stopped climbing a long time ago (or never even started climbing) because logically, it didn't make sense to climb the mountain. But God has chosen this beautiful hike, this upward calling, for me and being weak is full qualification.
Do you feel weak? Are people giving you their wisdom that is completely opposite of what God is calling you to? Do you feel feeble? If those answers are yes, know that God has called you and God has chosen you to endeavor on this faith filled hike in life. What are the areas that fearful in your life? What are the hindrances that are in your thoughts that are keeping you from continuing? I know it is so needful for me to write down those things, identify them, see them written on paper and look at them soberly.
We need to remind ourselves of God's truth. God's truth is "Who is he who condemns? It is Christ who died, and furthermore is also risen, who is even at the right hand of God, who also makes intercession for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril or sword?... Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us." Romans 8:34-37.
So my weakness, my frailty, my simplicity, my lack of musical perfection or perfect pitch or ability to hit the right chords on the guitar, doesn't disqualify me. God hasn't judged me, like an American Idol panel, and told me to go home. I have just almost asked that He would send me home. How silly is that? Oh how fear and worry inhibit faith.
Tomorrow I am leading worship for the k-5 Sunday schoolers at Calvary Chapel Beachside. This is the first time I'll be leading at beachside on a Sunday and I can't think of a better audience. I know children are very forgiving- they won't have critical ears when I mess up. In fact, I've heard that these kids are so great that they dance and clap their hands when they worship and I am so looking forward to that time of uninhibited worship. I know I'll learn from them tomorrow and receive a bulky blessing.
My mind ponders this: Who am I that God would use me? Who am I that He would choose me? I am nothing, and yet He wants me. I am nothing, and yet He uses me. These facts have been blowing my mind and have put all logic in the dumpster. God's love is so illogical! God's love is incalculable! My thoughts can't compartmentalize it.
Faith. This whole life in Christ is completely settled in this one word. Faith; not even my own but it is the free gift of God (Eph. 2:8-10). But why? I'm not deserving this gift, I'm not deserving of a life full of God's blessings, I'm not deserving of a great calling, I'm not deserving of my desires being fulfilled. But God, just because, has made up His mind to love me unconditionally. The same is for you. God has great things for you just because He loves you.
This post is long and probably much more beneficial to me than to you. Sometimes I just need to write out the swells of thoughts that are in my head and heart. I guess tonight was just a time of opening the flood-gates. I do hope you are encouraged, by this feeble, small, insignificant and weak woman to continue in your own personal life. So are you weak? Well, than just like me, we're qualified and chosen. Let's keep our faith in God and let Him do all He desires to do through us.
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