Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Hair up, p.j.'s on, we are free!

Have you ever gotten home after some sort of formal occasion where you needed to look fancy and the first thing you do when you step over the threshold of your door is run into your room, change into the most comfortable clothes you own (most likely your p.j.'s) wash your face, pull your hair up (assuming your are a girl), and plop on the couch in blissful relief because you are home, and you can just be you; no heels, no dress, no plastered hair?
I was recently at a high school during an outreach to the freshman there and I had this scenario ran through my mind. As I viewed the girls, and as I looked into my own self, I realized how much we just want to be us, be comfortable, be home. But there is opposition to that, isn't there? Well, if our hair isn't done right, if our clothes don't match the fashion standards, if our makeup isn't making us look bright and happy and awake, then, well, it needs to be! But what I've found is trying to maintain that, striving for such perfection and outward happiness is tiring. I just want to be me- no makeup, no fancy hair that has all the product in it to give lift, shine, and curl- no, nothing. I just want to be me, purple star p.j. pants and all!
God wants us to come to Him, just as we are, however quirky onlookers we view ourselves as. God loves His daughters to just have no reserve in approaching him (his sons too, but fella's, I'm sorry I just can't relate to you as well). God requires no clean up.
So I want to make this declaration to any of my sisters who feel like they have been striving in maintaining a life that personifies something much more perfect than what they know they are: Let's live, for our God, and be free to come to him with all our imperfections in tact! Yes, take out those contacts, put on the nerdy glasses, wash your face, pull back your hair, slip on the sweat pants, laugh, smile, be unashamed of who your Father has made you to be! No more pretending; you are beautiful and wonderful and full of unique character just the way you are, and you don't even have to try!
WE ARE FREE, my sisters, we are free!
"What heights of love, what depths of peace, when fears are stilled, when strivings cease. My Comforter, my All in all, here in the love of Christ I stand."

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Fairytale Love Stories and Happily-Ever-Afters

Sometimes I wonder where God is going to take me next or how He's going to surprise me and make my wildest dreams come true. I suppose you can call me one of those "helpless romantics"; yeah, I'll own up to that title. Thinking about fairytale love stories with happily-ever-afters does seem to be the topic of many of my thoughts. I have conjured up great ways to be whisked away by my knight in shining armor. Like this one: I'll be walking along in a quiet park filled with giant green trees and colorful flowers. Just as I stoop to admire on, to engage myself in the intricate beauty of it, all of a sudden a handsome man taps me on the shoulder, and ever so politely, yet boldly asks, "Do you mind if I join you in your admiration of this beautiful creation?" Then, after chatting about the flower for a bit, we raise ourselves to our feet, stroll along the sidewalk, talking and pausing to glance into each others eyes. There is not one stupid or ditzy word that I say that makes him want to leave the conversation and there surely isn't one word he could say that I wouldn't hold to as if it were gold. Simply to state it, we fall in love. Strolls in the park turn to adventures in our car, which turn to family gatherings for holidays, which turn to every day phone calls, grocery shopping dates, morning wake up calls, prayer on the phone, bible study, and as the days progress, so does the love. Then comes the day, the day I would least expect to be a special one, and just as gently as he knelt down the first time we talked over the flower, he kneels down again to ask me to be his bride. "Yes" I smile, barely able to utter any other words. "Yes" I say as I look into the eyes of the one who has chosen me to spend the rest of his life with. "Yes" I say to the next step of faith, the new season in life, the identity of now being one with this man and having his name as my own. Then comes everything wedding; details, plans, mothers, grandmas, in-laws, dresses, catering, cake, honeymoon.... and then, then.......
Life. Together. Forever.
Perhaps I've allowed myself to meditate on these kinds of thoughts far too much. Perhaps I have let these fantasies so captivate my thoughts that I have forgotten what a love I have right here, right now, in Christ.
He'll look at the flowers with me. He'll walk along the park sidewalks and listen to my every silly word. He'll whisk me away on adventure, introduce me to the body of Christ, my family, in whom I had no clue I had. He'll be there to talk when I wake up. He'll accompany me on every grocery outing. He's place the Holy Spirit in my life as a seal, as if He's put a ring around my heart. All I do now is look forward to the day He calls me, His bride-to-be, to come, enter in the marriage supper of the lamb, where He, the groom, and me, His bride, will be united and together forever and ever, where He will give me a new name.
It seems as though I already have my perfect love story. It seems as though all those fairy tale thoughts have partially come true and are promised to fully come true.
But I'm here right now, on earth, and I know I am to be content, in whatever state I find myself in. Do my hearts longings to be a bride hold any validity, or is it impatience that is really groaning within me? I would hope to think that if truly I were impatient, then I would just say, "HEY EVERY SINGLE GODLY MAN OUT THERE- WANNA MARRY ME?" and I haven't done that. Yes, I do admit I have to take my questions to God, surrender my thoughts and say, "Oh, Lord, could it be he?" I would be lying by saying I don't notice single godly men. And what is it that when there is a single godly man in the room, there is this tension, this pull of opposing or attracting magnetic force? What a mystery. But I'm honest to God, and now to all who read this, about my thoughts.
Nonetheless, I wait. I trust, that all the fantasizing I've done in the past, ever since my brain comprehended the concept of falling in love, that God has a perfect plan. Do I take on the role of the princess in the tower waiting for her prince? Do I take on the role of the princess who gets out of the tower, finds the gentlest, handsomest, hard working man with a loyal heart and courageous character and tell him, "I want to be yours forever?" Take action, or wait? Trust and sit, or trust and walk toward what I see may be the best?
A very wise man once said, "The very best choice will be made when God does the choosing." So I guess all these answers to these deep hearts questions can be answered by the One who made me, and Him alone.
I want to happily wait, seek God, and see where He s going to take me next or how He's going to surprise me and make my wildest dreams come true.
"For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways," says the LORD. "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts." -Isaiah 55:8&9
These words I hold as my promise. Thank You heavenly Father.
So wait, i will. And walk, I will. Seek, I will. Ask, I will. Knock, I will, and I will trust that the author of my fairytale love story and happily-ever-after will make it come true.