I'm very careful with my words; I don't spill all of my soul out to everyone. I think that is a good thing; it keeps me protected. I think it's a bad thing too; it keeps me protected.
There's something awful about exposing the depths of ones heart and soul. It's vulnerable and risky. But sometimes it is wonderful and taking the chance is great.
I have had friends I can do that with, but mostly, I've been able to do that with my parents. Is that weird? I'll answer: No, that isn't weird. Right now though, as I feel my life taking on a new maturity and independence, I have only been able to expose my all to God.
Right now is sweet in the life of Melissa Rae Shelton. I'm currently "house sitting" for a friend who is in Israel, which means I get a taste of complete independence. Sure, I still go over to my parents place (which is five blocks away) for coffee and cinnamon rolls and dinner, but I so treasure the time I get to just do my laundry and read my bible in the solitude of the two bedroom home I temporarily call mine.
A song comes to mind as a theme for my life right now: "He's called me to the wilderness where I can learn to sing. And He lets me know my bareness so I can learn to lean". God is calling me to a quietness, with just Him and me. I don't know really what He's doing, and I don't need to. I get impatient and I want to hear answers. So, I have to fight wanting to get them from the people I love and look up to and to just be set with hearing from Love Himself.
Here is something that I am more confidant to say right now: God loves me. He loves every bit about the way He created me. He has plans for me and a future for me. He's called me to serve Him and love Him and love others.
Maturity is what I'm experiencing. Growth. Roots going deep into the Love of God. I'm growing. That's good. Sometimes it takes storms to grow and roots to go deep too. That's good as well. And wildernesses make the roots go to the depths of where the water is.
I realize my thoughts are a bit scattered, and I realize that sometimes I speak in circles and confuse those who are the recipients of my words, but I also realize that I can encourage others to keep letting God do His work in them through my words, which hopefully are expressions of God's heart. So, you, who ever you are, keep letting God do His work in you and don't be afraid to walk by faith and not by sight. Cling to Him, He is your life. Love God and do what you want! Delight yourself in the Lord, and HE WILL GIVE YOU THE DESIRES OF YOUR HEART. Sometimes you don't even know what those desires are, but He'll be faithful to give them to you. This life is but a short vapor. Let your roots sink deep.
"For this reason I bow my knees to the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, from whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named, that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might through His Spirit in the inner man, that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height- to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God."
Ephesians 2:14-19
That's all for now.
Until next time, my dear friends and patient readers.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Monday, February 21, 2011
I Press On
I will take nothing that which is not given to me; I will not hold onto what is given. Self indulgence is not what I desire.
What is required of me, a Christ follower? What I desire is detachment from all I could hold dear as comfort and pleasure. What does surrender look like? How do I walk in it?
I like things; I like my room, my bed, my coffee and gluten free crackers; but those are nothing to hold to. They are nothing in the long scheme of thing.
Abandonment is what I'm learning. Abandoning my dreams, my desires, my romances. Is this easy? No. Is this logical to anyone? Not really. Forsaking all, leaving all, and following Christ is what I will do. My clothes, my comforts, my identity is all wrapped up in the Man who is leading me; Jesus Christ the Lord. Why? What else is there to live for? For me? For my pleasure? That will leave me ruined, devastated and far from the Love of God. I will be left wallowing in my mire and unaware that it's stench is deathly to those that catch its whiff.
Another weight behind; I press on. Toward Jesus, I press on.
What is required of me, a Christ follower? What I desire is detachment from all I could hold dear as comfort and pleasure. What does surrender look like? How do I walk in it?
I like things; I like my room, my bed, my coffee and gluten free crackers; but those are nothing to hold to. They are nothing in the long scheme of thing.
Abandonment is what I'm learning. Abandoning my dreams, my desires, my romances. Is this easy? No. Is this logical to anyone? Not really. Forsaking all, leaving all, and following Christ is what I will do. My clothes, my comforts, my identity is all wrapped up in the Man who is leading me; Jesus Christ the Lord. Why? What else is there to live for? For me? For my pleasure? That will leave me ruined, devastated and far from the Love of God. I will be left wallowing in my mire and unaware that it's stench is deathly to those that catch its whiff.
Another weight behind; I press on. Toward Jesus, I press on.
Monday, February 7, 2011
on a white paper heart
Valentines day is approaching; yes, that means red glitter, Hershey's Kisses, stuffed bears and lots and lots of hearts.
Love.
Let's reflect.
Love is great! I believe it is the greatest desire of every human being. It was love that moved God, the God of ALL THINGS EVER CREATED, to send His Son, in whom He fully indwelled, to die and take all our sin so that we could be presented to Him in holiness.
Love.
There is no greater demonstration of love than that of Jesus Christ.
I really like love movies, I will be honest. I really like weddings as well. I really like seeing people walk hand in hand, or parents play with their children, or children play dress up with each other. I believe love is demonstrated in all scenarios.
Have you ever heard of the five love languages? Words of affirmation, gifting, helping, physical touch or just hanging out? (those aren't the exact words for each language, but they incapsulate the gist). I really think a person can be given love in each way, but they feel more love from one over the others. Well, all this to say, a couple of nights ago I saw love displayed, on a white paper heart.
Isaac, my youngest brother, is a romantic. In fact, he has already picked out his bride. Yes, he tells people he will marry her. Who is this young lady, you ask? Her name is Gracie, and just for the record, I completely approve :) Isaac has kissed Gracie- I believe it happened after a chase through the church. Precious. He plans on giving her a ring; we've discussed it. For now, Gracie's title to Isaac is "Girlfriend", but he is keeping the end goal of holy matrimony in perspective. No other girl quite compares to Gracie for Isaac, and the feelings are mutual, just ask Gracie's dad.
Back to a couple of nights ago. Isaac showed me the valentine he made for Gracie.
The left side on the white paper heart reads:
"You are a good friend.
It is fun to play with you."
And the right, appropriately illustrated with a girl and boy holding hands, reads:
"I love you."
Love. The greatest gift of all.
"By this all will know you are my disciples, if you have love for one another."
John 13:35
Love.
Let's reflect.
Love is great! I believe it is the greatest desire of every human being. It was love that moved God, the God of ALL THINGS EVER CREATED, to send His Son, in whom He fully indwelled, to die and take all our sin so that we could be presented to Him in holiness.
Love.
There is no greater demonstration of love than that of Jesus Christ.
I really like love movies, I will be honest. I really like weddings as well. I really like seeing people walk hand in hand, or parents play with their children, or children play dress up with each other. I believe love is demonstrated in all scenarios.
Have you ever heard of the five love languages? Words of affirmation, gifting, helping, physical touch or just hanging out? (those aren't the exact words for each language, but they incapsulate the gist). I really think a person can be given love in each way, but they feel more love from one over the others. Well, all this to say, a couple of nights ago I saw love displayed, on a white paper heart.
Isaac, my youngest brother, is a romantic. In fact, he has already picked out his bride. Yes, he tells people he will marry her. Who is this young lady, you ask? Her name is Gracie, and just for the record, I completely approve :) Isaac has kissed Gracie- I believe it happened after a chase through the church. Precious. He plans on giving her a ring; we've discussed it. For now, Gracie's title to Isaac is "Girlfriend", but he is keeping the end goal of holy matrimony in perspective. No other girl quite compares to Gracie for Isaac, and the feelings are mutual, just ask Gracie's dad.
Back to a couple of nights ago. Isaac showed me the valentine he made for Gracie.
The left side on the white paper heart reads:
"You are a good friend.
It is fun to play with you."
And the right, appropriately illustrated with a girl and boy holding hands, reads:
"I love you."
Love. The greatest gift of all.
"By this all will know you are my disciples, if you have love for one another."
John 13:35
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Today I met Anne
As I was on my way to my sister's basketball game today, I saw a woman on the sidewalk walking. This woman wasn't any unfamiliar woman to me, in fact, In the summer time, I see her often. She unashamedly wears her swim suit top, running shorts (or something of the like), has a book in her hand, and walks. She walks and walks and walks and walks. Many times I have wondered, "where is that lady going? How long has she been walking? Gosh, she walks as if she is in pain. Is this a part of her daily routine? Who is this woman?" Even as my mom and I would take short trips in the car, doing our little errands, we would point out, "there's that woman again. Where is she going?"
One day, some months ago, perhaps a year, after seeing this woman walking I concluded that I was going to stop her and talk with her to find out the answers to my questions and who she is. The interesting thing about God planning our days for us is that we don't know what they will exactly hold and today was the day I was going to meet that woman. Today I met Anne.
I do admit, once I saw her, I hesitated parking my car. So I proceeded past her, turned a corner, backtracked, turned again, and asked God for boldness, the words to say, and to dispel all hesitation due to probable awkwardness. I parked my red convertible on the the side of the street, got out of the car, left it running, shut the door, walked in her direction and began my introduction. Using force in my voice, due to the distance between us, I said, "excuse me ma'am! Ma'am! Excuse me."
She stopped, a bit unaware of why I was wanting her attention, as I proceeded, "I see you walking a lot, especially in the summer, and I wanted to say hi."
The woman said, " Walking is healthy. My name is Anne. I live around this area. Are you a college student here at Augustana?"
I told here a bit about the past couple of years of my life and how I attended some bible schools. We asked questions back and forth as we began walking together; I got the impression that Anne doesn't like standing still for too long. I was finding it a bit hard to keep my footing in the slick snow- perhaps it is the lack of traction on my boots, but Anne was pro. Along with a noticeable limp in her walk and slouch in her back, and frailty in her structure, she was holding a gas station tumbler in her right hand- the whole time I wondered what it contained but never asked.
Anne told me that she went to high school here in the city of Sioux Falls, around forty five years ago. She now walks, swims, and teaches english to people who have immigrated here. Anne is 60, which took me by surprise, because she looks like she could be for 85. She lives by herself, but that's as far as I got to know. She picked up her pace and didn't give me a formal good-bye, but just walked on over the hill in the road. As I slowed my pace, I said in a raised voice, "Anne, Jesus Christ loves you." I hope those words forever remain in her thoughts.
I walked back to my car, which was now a block away, and I thought of what it would be like to be Anne. I looked at the trees and thought of how she is able to enjoy them, because they are her company. The buildings are probably wonderful sights, especially the mosaics of the Lutheran church that we were by. I'm sure the books that she holds, or the contents of the mug in her hand provide some sort of joy as well...
I wonder if Anne is lonely. I wonder if she ever wants someone to just walk with her, listen to her thoughts, and to talk back.
This unexpected encounter with Anne will probably forever change my life, maybe not drastically right away, but eventually. Maybe she hasn't heard the name of Jesus Christ in a long time; maybe she's never come in contact with a person in whom He indwells. Did He, Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit, God, the Father, continue on in the walk with Anne today? I trust He did. Did she know His presence? Did she feel His peace? Did she know His joy?
I know we are like fragrance to those we meet."For we are to God the fragrance of Christ among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing. To the one we are the aroma of death leading to death, and to the other the aroma of life leading to life." 2 Cor. 2:15 & 16a
May Anne be in the company of the former.
There are many more words on my heart and in my head and lessons I was taught today, but I'll leave this segment of my encounter with Anne as is, perhaps adding to it later.
Today I met Anne and I am grateful for it.
One day, some months ago, perhaps a year, after seeing this woman walking I concluded that I was going to stop her and talk with her to find out the answers to my questions and who she is. The interesting thing about God planning our days for us is that we don't know what they will exactly hold and today was the day I was going to meet that woman. Today I met Anne.
I do admit, once I saw her, I hesitated parking my car. So I proceeded past her, turned a corner, backtracked, turned again, and asked God for boldness, the words to say, and to dispel all hesitation due to probable awkwardness. I parked my red convertible on the the side of the street, got out of the car, left it running, shut the door, walked in her direction and began my introduction. Using force in my voice, due to the distance between us, I said, "excuse me ma'am! Ma'am! Excuse me."
She stopped, a bit unaware of why I was wanting her attention, as I proceeded, "I see you walking a lot, especially in the summer, and I wanted to say hi."
The woman said, " Walking is healthy. My name is Anne. I live around this area. Are you a college student here at Augustana?"
I told here a bit about the past couple of years of my life and how I attended some bible schools. We asked questions back and forth as we began walking together; I got the impression that Anne doesn't like standing still for too long. I was finding it a bit hard to keep my footing in the slick snow- perhaps it is the lack of traction on my boots, but Anne was pro. Along with a noticeable limp in her walk and slouch in her back, and frailty in her structure, she was holding a gas station tumbler in her right hand- the whole time I wondered what it contained but never asked.
Anne told me that she went to high school here in the city of Sioux Falls, around forty five years ago. She now walks, swims, and teaches english to people who have immigrated here. Anne is 60, which took me by surprise, because she looks like she could be for 85. She lives by herself, but that's as far as I got to know. She picked up her pace and didn't give me a formal good-bye, but just walked on over the hill in the road. As I slowed my pace, I said in a raised voice, "Anne, Jesus Christ loves you." I hope those words forever remain in her thoughts.
I walked back to my car, which was now a block away, and I thought of what it would be like to be Anne. I looked at the trees and thought of how she is able to enjoy them, because they are her company. The buildings are probably wonderful sights, especially the mosaics of the Lutheran church that we were by. I'm sure the books that she holds, or the contents of the mug in her hand provide some sort of joy as well...
I wonder if Anne is lonely. I wonder if she ever wants someone to just walk with her, listen to her thoughts, and to talk back.
This unexpected encounter with Anne will probably forever change my life, maybe not drastically right away, but eventually. Maybe she hasn't heard the name of Jesus Christ in a long time; maybe she's never come in contact with a person in whom He indwells. Did He, Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit, God, the Father, continue on in the walk with Anne today? I trust He did. Did she know His presence? Did she feel His peace? Did she know His joy?
I know we are like fragrance to those we meet."For we are to God the fragrance of Christ among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing. To the one we are the aroma of death leading to death, and to the other the aroma of life leading to life." 2 Cor. 2:15 & 16a
May Anne be in the company of the former.
There are many more words on my heart and in my head and lessons I was taught today, but I'll leave this segment of my encounter with Anne as is, perhaps adding to it later.
Today I met Anne and I am grateful for it.
Thursday, November 25, 2010
I Am Thankful
This song has been running through my head this morning and I would like to share the words with you all:
How could I ever say thank you
When the whole of this life’s not enough
Though I offer each breath back in worship
It never could match your great love
So great are your ways
Such encompassing grace
Love that reaches beyond each defense
Your mercy disarms
The most broken of hearts
Such complete and profound faithfulness
How could I thank you
How could I ever repay you
When you laid aside heaven for me
You came to the earth, its Creator
Incarnate to set sinners free
I love you Lord
I love you Lord
I love you Lord
I love you Lord
By Katherine Scott
How can I truly thank God for all He's done? For salvation and freedom, hope and peace, love and joy, I'm thankful. For my family, friends, adventures and times of quiet rest, I'm thankful. For the good, the trials, the testings, the fires, and the mountain tops where I can declare that God is good, I am thankful. For the food and friends and family that fill this day, I am thankful.
Why do we even enjoy such blessings? And then, topping it all, to think of the hope of heaven, the reunion we will will have face to face with the One who created us! Our unrighteousness will truly be purged, our sin will never be a part of us again. Our relationship with LOVE will be restored perfectly; every desire, longing, and aching met by the One who has eyes like the flame of fire.
Thank you Lord. Thank you Lord.
For You Lord, I am thankful.
How could I ever say thank you
When the whole of this life’s not enough
Though I offer each breath back in worship
It never could match your great love
So great are your ways
Such encompassing grace
Love that reaches beyond each defense
Your mercy disarms
The most broken of hearts
Such complete and profound faithfulness
How could I thank you
How could I ever repay you
When you laid aside heaven for me
You came to the earth, its Creator
Incarnate to set sinners free
I love you Lord
I love you Lord
I love you Lord
I love you Lord
By Katherine Scott
How can I truly thank God for all He's done? For salvation and freedom, hope and peace, love and joy, I'm thankful. For my family, friends, adventures and times of quiet rest, I'm thankful. For the good, the trials, the testings, the fires, and the mountain tops where I can declare that God is good, I am thankful. For the food and friends and family that fill this day, I am thankful.
Why do we even enjoy such blessings? And then, topping it all, to think of the hope of heaven, the reunion we will will have face to face with the One who created us! Our unrighteousness will truly be purged, our sin will never be a part of us again. Our relationship with LOVE will be restored perfectly; every desire, longing, and aching met by the One who has eyes like the flame of fire.
Thank you Lord. Thank you Lord.
For You Lord, I am thankful.
Sunday, November 7, 2010
In Your Heart
"And in their hearts they turned back to Egypt..." Acts 7: 39b
The heart. We know that out of it's abundance, the mouth speaks. We know we are to guard it diligently because out of our heart flows the issues of life. Our hearts are both wonderful and dangerous places.
I remember years back having my bible school teachers always say, "The heart of every issue is the issue of every heart" and I'm finding that to be more and more true.
I just recently came back from a trip to Southern Cali and upon my return, I've found that I have had an uneasy heart. Physically, I am in Sioux Falls, SD, but in my heart, I'm partly still there. I desire an undivided heart.
This is the problem, to some extent, that the Israelites had when they came out of Egypt. They turned away in their hearts from the Lord and the place He had them. They were in the wilderness; an undesirable, uncomfortable and unfamiliar land. They had spent 400 years in captivity and after coming through a great deliverance, they doubted God's continued guidance and in their hearts, left God.
So let's apply this to our lives. In what way have we been delivered? Has it been from an addiction? A lifestyle that reflects the world? Maybe anger or yelling profanities? Have you been delivered from thoughts that lead to depression, maybe even suicide? Do you find yourself going back? Are you in a place where you've been delivered, but, because you are experiencing a wilderness and God's next step has yet to be revealed to you, you are turning to the place you've been delivered from?
Let's learn from the children of Israel, the one's who bore the name of "Chosen By God", just as we do, to not turn back! Take up the shield of faith, breastplate of righteousness, belt of truth, helmet of Salvation, the shoes of the Gospel of peace and the sword of the Spirit and stand- endure patiently in the wilderness. God's plans will be revealed.
The reason I write is because I'm going through it. I need more than anything to not have a heart that turns back to Egypt. I need patience and faith, hope and love through it all. I need to stand when I all I want to do is quit. I'm desperate and unashamed to admit so. But just because I can't see, because I don't know what is ahead, I don't want that to make me long for what is behind.
"Now unto Him who is able to keep you from stumbling, and to present you faultless before the presence of His glory with exceeding joy, to God our Savior who alone is wise, be glory and majesty, dominion and power, both now and forever. Amen." Jude 24 & 25
May God speak to your heart.
-Handmaiden of the Lord.
The heart. We know that out of it's abundance, the mouth speaks. We know we are to guard it diligently because out of our heart flows the issues of life. Our hearts are both wonderful and dangerous places.
I remember years back having my bible school teachers always say, "The heart of every issue is the issue of every heart" and I'm finding that to be more and more true.
I just recently came back from a trip to Southern Cali and upon my return, I've found that I have had an uneasy heart. Physically, I am in Sioux Falls, SD, but in my heart, I'm partly still there. I desire an undivided heart.
This is the problem, to some extent, that the Israelites had when they came out of Egypt. They turned away in their hearts from the Lord and the place He had them. They were in the wilderness; an undesirable, uncomfortable and unfamiliar land. They had spent 400 years in captivity and after coming through a great deliverance, they doubted God's continued guidance and in their hearts, left God.
So let's apply this to our lives. In what way have we been delivered? Has it been from an addiction? A lifestyle that reflects the world? Maybe anger or yelling profanities? Have you been delivered from thoughts that lead to depression, maybe even suicide? Do you find yourself going back? Are you in a place where you've been delivered, but, because you are experiencing a wilderness and God's next step has yet to be revealed to you, you are turning to the place you've been delivered from?
Let's learn from the children of Israel, the one's who bore the name of "Chosen By God", just as we do, to not turn back! Take up the shield of faith, breastplate of righteousness, belt of truth, helmet of Salvation, the shoes of the Gospel of peace and the sword of the Spirit and stand- endure patiently in the wilderness. God's plans will be revealed.
The reason I write is because I'm going through it. I need more than anything to not have a heart that turns back to Egypt. I need patience and faith, hope and love through it all. I need to stand when I all I want to do is quit. I'm desperate and unashamed to admit so. But just because I can't see, because I don't know what is ahead, I don't want that to make me long for what is behind.
"Now unto Him who is able to keep you from stumbling, and to present you faultless before the presence of His glory with exceeding joy, to God our Savior who alone is wise, be glory and majesty, dominion and power, both now and forever. Amen." Jude 24 & 25
May God speak to your heart.
-Handmaiden of the Lord.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
12 flowers for 21 years
Like the flowers I got for my 21st birthday, I want to be as fragrant to those who pass by.
The sweet smell of my dozen white roses (thank you precious dad) is filling my room and reminding me of how a life can be. A life is like a flower- beautiful to behold. It blooms and it dies. That's how life is. As grass withers, and flowers fade, so do we. But this thing remains; the word of God.
I guess I just want to be as fragrant as possible while I'm here, before I die. And I'm not trying to sound morbid whatsoever, I just want to view life from a broad perspective. We have only one life to live; how am I living it? Am I, like the white roses, immersed in water, fragrant and brining joy to those who come in contact with them? Or am I more like a weed, a bother, destructive, life-sucking and ugly?
I want to be like my roses.
Small thought tonight as I close out day one of being 21.
"All flesh is grass, and all its loveliness is like the flower of the field. The grass withers, the flower fades, because the breath of the LORD blows upon it; surely the people are grass. The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our god stands forever." Isaiah 40:6b-8
The sweet smell of my dozen white roses (thank you precious dad) is filling my room and reminding me of how a life can be. A life is like a flower- beautiful to behold. It blooms and it dies. That's how life is. As grass withers, and flowers fade, so do we. But this thing remains; the word of God.
I guess I just want to be as fragrant as possible while I'm here, before I die. And I'm not trying to sound morbid whatsoever, I just want to view life from a broad perspective. We have only one life to live; how am I living it? Am I, like the white roses, immersed in water, fragrant and brining joy to those who come in contact with them? Or am I more like a weed, a bother, destructive, life-sucking and ugly?
I want to be like my roses.
Small thought tonight as I close out day one of being 21.
"All flesh is grass, and all its loveliness is like the flower of the field. The grass withers, the flower fades, because the breath of the LORD blows upon it; surely the people are grass. The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our god stands forever." Isaiah 40:6b-8
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